What I Would Have Said.....

On Wednesday, July 1, 2009, my father-in-law passed away. It was what I would call unexpectedly. He went in for a test on Friday, June 19th, and that test indicated he was sicker than we all thought. After what felt like a rollercoaster ride from 6/19 - 7/1 he went home to be with the Lord. I feel like I was so busy trying to help everyone that I didn't allow myself time to grieve. The memorial service was on the 4th of July. My mom and Danielle and Joseph left for Myrtle Beach on Monday the 6th and I spent the better part of that day crying - it finally all caught up with me...

Several family members spoke at the service - something I normally would have been very comfortable doing - but for some reason I just couldn't stand up and speak. I won't regret that I didn't because for the most part I wear my heart on my sleeve so people generally know how I feel about them. I did want to "memorialize" him in some way to help through my grieving so I have decided to write about some of my memories over the years:

My mother-in-law (Nanny Pat) met Nat (Poppy) when Joe and I were 18. She didn't really date after Joe's dad passed (when Joe was 5) until her kids were well into teenage years and grown-up. Poppy used to bring her a single rose when he would pick her up.

I remember when Nanny & Poppy walked into the house and I saw the engagment ring on her hand - I jumped up in excitement.

I remember crying so much as they had their first dance at their wedding reception (You are my lady by Airsupply) that my dad finally said to me "Why are you crying so much?" and I said "I am just so happy for them."

I remember when my own dad died and one of Poppy's friends asked me how my parents were (it was literally one day after we buried my dad) and I couldn't bare to say the words so Poppy jumped in and told them what happened. He lifted more off of me then he could have imagined.

I remember watching him with Christina, Kayla and Taylor when they were babies - he was always trying to make them laugh. He would do anything for the kids including baby-sit with Nanny anytime they were needed.

I remember when they would come to Charlotte to visit Joe and I before they moved here - Nanny always called Danielle "Her Southern Belle" and there was Poppy - "Danielle, that is an ugly dress, where did you get it?" because he knew she was going to say "No Poppy, my dress is not ugly!"

I remember how everytime I saw him he asked about my entire family - how is your mother, grandmother, Aunt Rose, does your brother like his new job, how are your sisters kids doing, and so on.

I remember how as soon as he walked in our house he would say "Roseann, did you make coffee???" And my mom always had it ready for him.

I remember how the first time people would meet him they would think (by his appearance) that he was tough but when they got to know him and when they saw him with his grandkids they knew he wasn't.

In summary I will always hold in my heart that Poppy loved all of us and our kids as if we were his own - I only wish (to quote Little Joe) that he (Little Joe) had known Poppy for more than 7 years.