It is never justified

All week I have been hearing little pieces of the Chris Brown/Rhianna story. At this point none of us know what really happened between them that night but I do know this, there is nothing and I mean nothing that a woman can do that justifies a man putting his hands on her. Some rumors have her hitting him first so I want to add that I do not think a woman should ever hit, kick, punch etc.... a man either.

I am not saying Chris Brown beat her up - we all need to wait and see what happens with that when all the facts are collected. I am saying for all of us, here in "real life" these things are unacceptable and inexcusable.

My hope is that very early on I can teach both my daughter and son that this is wrong and neither one of them should ever find excuses or justifications for this type of behavior.

This is a very personal issue to me - I have been there and done that. I thank God that he gave me the strength to see I was so much better than that and that I deserved so much more, and because I did He gave me the so much more in Joe.

I tell my nieces anytime it fits into conversation that if someone raises a hand to you end it. They will cry and say they are sorry, they will find an excuse, heck sometimes they will make you feel responsible but you are not and most importantly no one will ever hit you because "they love you so much".

I ask all of you teach your daughters to value themselves enough to never, ever accept this and teach your sons to use "gentle touches" when it comes to girls.

Dads - yes I am talking to all of you now - teach your daughter how she should be treated by a man. You are the biggest male influence in their lives and if you hold them on a pedestal they will seek a man who does the same. In the moment I may not have understood all that my father was trying to teach me, but now as a 40 year old woman, I sure do.